Why?

A few days ago as I rolled out my mat I was still conflicted about abandoning family and work for my practice that evening. I had to remind myself yet again why I leave the many responsibilities tugging at me and head to the yoga studio. I counted the reasons off to myself.  Exercise, of course; yoga is good for the body. It keeps me in shape and just makes me feel healthier. But really, since I had just been to the studio the day before I could have skipped a day without complete deterioration of my physical self. It’s a spiritual practice too, I reminded myself, a form of meditation. It’s a discipline; it reminds me that I can do the things I set my mind to, and that I can carve out time in my schedule for the things that are important to me.  Later, probably during handstands, I realized the most important truth; yoga is fun. When I was a little girl, I spent most of my free time dancing around my bedroom, and tumbling across the floor. Back when I had no demands on my time and could fill each moment with whatever brought me spontaneous joy, I was doing exactly this.  As adults we hardly ever get to dance around in a big open space like I did when I was little, (just stretching out in public will earn you some weird stares) but for that hour and a half in the yoga studio I can stretch myself out in all directions. I can roll on my back and stand on my hands and even laugh with friends who share the sheer joy of such things.  By choosing yoga as my practice, as my spiritual discipline, I have built what I enjoy most about being alive right into my day. It’s a commitment worth keeping, even if it takes me a while to remember why.